Sunday, May 11, 2008

On the Efficacy of Prayer on Oil prices

At a Shell gas station in Washington, Rocky Twyman and an unusual group of activists were mad as hell about soaring fuel prices.

"Last week, this station was 3.51 dollars. Now it's practically 3.60. So it's gone up nine cents in one week," Twyman said as he pumped five dollars' worth of gas into his thirsty American car.
"Someone's making a lot of money and it's really, really wrong," added Twyman, who founded the Prayer at the Pump movement last week to seek help from a higher power to bring down fuel prices, because the powers in Washington haven't.


The half-dozen activists -- Twyman, a former Miss Washington DC, the owner of a small construction company and two volunteers at a local soup kitchen -- joined hands, bowed their heads and intoned a heartfelt prayer.

"Lord, come down in a mighty way and strengthen us so that we can bring down these high gas prices," Twyman said to a chorus of "amens".

"Prayer is the answer to every problem in life... We call on God to intervene in the lives of the selfish, greedy people who are keeping these prices high," Twyman said on the gas station forecourt in a neighborhood of Washington that, like many of its residents, has seen better days.
"Lord, the prices at this pump have gone up since last week. We know that you are able, that you have all the power in the world," he prayed, before former beauty queen Rashida Jolley led the group in a modified version of the spiritual, "We Shall Overcome".


"We'll have lower gas prices, we'll have lower gas prices..." they sang.

I'm sure these prayers will be answered in much the same way that the prayers imploring god to reanimate the dead gramma on the shitter in Wisconsin were answered. In other words, they won't be...

I'm sure I'd just laugh at these fucking idiots if they were praying at a gas station where I was filling up my tank (but I might take my business elsewhere if the gas station allowed such nonsense on its property). As Penn Jilette might say, "Sweet Jesus, the Jew, what a load of bullshit!"

10 comments:

Ceroill said...

What can I say here, but "OY!"

BAWDYSCOT said...

God as a market manipulator, interesting concept. What better way to use your omniscient powers than to move markets. Why didn't he/she think of that before?

csm said...

If you've got an all-powerful god to pray to, why not just pray for a "magic" gas tank that gets filled up automatically whenever it dips below half full? Just goes to show how unimaginative those "believers" can be, I s'pose... or is praying for a never-empty gas tank too greedy, whereas praying for lower prices is not?

Ceroill said...

csm, I'd say the latter. See, if you manage to get gas prices lowered that helps everyone, not just you.

csm said...

Then perhaps one should pray for everyone to have the "magic" gas tank, no?

Ceroill said...

I know it's not particularly rational, or logical, but I think that somehow the 'best' prayers are for nebulous 'environmental' (in the broadest possible sense) effects rather than direct personal rewards/awards. As such, a lowering of general prices of something would be more favorably seen than wishing for each person to have an automatic abundance of that item.
Another good kind of prayer is for others to be able to resist sin/temptation to their own betterment. Example: Rather than praying for everyone to be able to not have to exercise and watch food intake, you should instead pray for them all to have the strength of spirit to resist the temptation to indulge, and to be more active.
By the way, I kept having to keep myself from writing 'wish' instead of 'pray'.

csm said...

Of course, those prayers, if answered, would screw the people providing the oil because they would not be getting a fair price for their product and work, right?

BAWDYSCOT said...

The same theory, csm, when I mention how healthcare providers are set to get screwed if and when universal healthcare and the requisite price controls are installed.

csm said...

Yes, Bawdy, but that case does not involve a supposedly-fair-minded deity (at least not to my knowledge).

Ceroill said...

csm, but god is omnipotent! He can (somehow) arrange it so that not only does the price go down, but nobody goes hungry from low pay either! He's god he can do anything!

I like the little demo vid about the milk jug.